FRIDAY ENERGY LEGGOOOOOOOOO. It’s the fucking weekend, and it’s time to wrap it all up with the Weekly QTE’s. Song of the day for me is “XO Tour Llif3” by Lil Uzi Vert, mostly due to TimTheTatman. I was watching some highlights from his early Overwatch streams and this remix of the song came on. It is fucking fire guys; give it a listen.

Let’s dive into the news:

Modern Warfare multiplayer may actually be fun now that this patch is live

Well, that was fast. Some would argue not fast enough, but regardless I’m happy that Infinity Ward is addressing these issues early on. How long were the akimbo Model 1887s broken? Like 2 months? Thank god we only had to deal with the 725 “sniper shotty” for two weeks. So let’s really quickly recap the important updates:

  • 725 shotgun damage spread increased and damage range decreased. No stats to how much each of these were adjusted, so we’ll just have to test it out ourselves.
  • Claymores will no longer kill you if you shoot them with full health. Also, the trigger and damage radiuses have been reduced, meaning you shouldn’t fucking die trying to get close enough to shoot the claymore. You will still probably get fucked up by triggering a claymore, but Blast Shield might actually work now.
  • Footstep volumes have been “tweaked” in a few different ways, but the big change is still to come in the next patch, where your footstep volume will be reduced while crouched or during ADS movement. So you still need to have Dead Silence on at all times.
  • The Riot Shield should be completely fixed now. The shield will now go on the players back while throwing knives, and they’ve made explosive damage more consistent (hopefully in a good way). Infinity Ward has also noted that this will be a WIP, and there may be future adjustments.

So yea, all the big issues have been addressed along with some other minor balancing and connectivity improvements. Now whether that translates to gameplay or not is another issue, but I feel kinda confident that Infinity Ward will figure this out. (Please IW don’t prove me wrong…)

This VR game looks both badass and exhausting

So Pistol Whip is a new VR title that I hadn’t heard of before this week and it looks fucking awesome. Almost like a virtual John Wick trainer paired with a rhythm system like Beat Saber. The game looks fun as hell and is one of the few titles that make me wish I owned an Oculus. I will say this though, I’m not sure how long I could play this game in one session. Dodging those bullets looks exhausting, but maybe it would get me off my ass longer than Pokemon Go did a few years ago (I think I only lasted like a week and a half?). If you own a VR system, I think this is a must buy.

An absolutely HILARIOUS attempt by a nerd to get laid

This post might have made me a daily subscriber to the “Am I the Asshole” Reddit page, because I just died laughing at this post. I don’t really give a fuck how old you are; on what planet is this a good idea? First off, let’s be clear about something: this isn’t an attempt to make friends, this is an attempt to meet college co-eds. Like he legitimately thought “I want to meet hot girls, so I’m going to make them take A QUIZ to come to my Rick and Morty watch party.” Hey man, I legitimately don’t know many “hot girls” that actually like Rick and Morty so you’re already setting your expectations way too fucking high. Second, who in their right mind wants to take a quiz to go to an event? Like if I’m going to take a quiz to go to an event (which I automatically wouldn’t because that’s the stupidest way to make an event exclusive), it better be the most insane event of all time. Instead, you’re literally just inviting people to watch an animated TV show in a college dorm room on a “good TV”. No buddy, you’re not an asshole, you’re just a complete fucking moron.

The Chinese government is full of fucking idiots for thinking this will work

So China is only going to allow kids under the age of 18 to play online games for an hour and a half a day (3 hours on holidays), which has to take place between 8am and 10pm. Let me say this as someone who grew up in a sheltered home where my parents put restrictions on my gaming time: it doesn’t work. In fact, I’m convinced that by putting these restrictions in place it will actually have an adverse effect on these kids once they turn 18. They’re going to go fucking bananas and play for like 12 hours a day. So congratulations China, instead of a bunch of addicted children you’re going to have a bunch of addicted adults. Horrible, horrible move you dumb fucks.

Child banned for cheating in Fortnite and everyone thinks it’s unfair…WHAT?

Ok, let’s recap shall we? Last Sunday this kid from FaZe clan announced that he’s been given a lifetime ban from Fortnite for using aimbots in casual modes. This caused an uproar from the streaming community including big boys like Ninja and DrDisrespect, who think this penalty is WAY too severe by Epic Games and that it should be reduced to a smaller ban. Both argue that FaZe Jarvis didn’t use the cheats in any competitive mode and that he was just using it to make content for his platforms. On top of this, there are people who have been caught cheating with similar aimbot style tactics in competitive modes that only received a short ban. Epic has yet to respond to any of the criticism of their decision.

So here’s my take: cheating is bad. If it were up to me, I would have done the exact same thing Epic did regardless of whether it was done in a casual or competitive mode. I don’t care how old you are, I don’t care how much money you make, I don’t care how popular you are; you just can’t do it. Want to make content that’s funny using an aimbot? How about you start a private game with the 3000 members of FaZe Clan and your viewers and make a video with an aimbot? That’s how you do it without being a complete asshole to anyone else playing the game casually. Now, I will say that it bothers me when a punishment is handed out inconsistently. So Epic, the right thing to do here is to reduce the ban on FaZe Jarvis to whatever the ban was for the aforementioned competitive players. However, I would also take this opportunity to state how you will handle bans from here forward. This story has received international attention, so there’s no better time to say “from here forward if you use any form of cheating in our game you will get a lifetime ban no questions asked”. That way, the lines are drawn and everyone has a final warning. Boom. Problem solved. You’re welcome world.

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